mastersslutslave:

Building walls..

When I feel unheard, or not understood, or not valued by My Master I try and build walls.

All those walls He worked so hard to knock down, I look around me and see the rubble of them, the remnants and I start trying to fortify myself…

Don’t feel so much.

Don’t be so vulnerable.

Don’t be so open.

It’s like a default setting, a safety, but the reality is I’m building walls made from sand, safety is only found by being vulnerable, by letting him in, by feeling deeply and completely.

I have to take the risk, I gave Him me and that has to be ALL of me. I have to have faith that He will not let me re-fortify, that I am worthy of Him battling His way through every single time.

The walls I had and I thought kept me safe in fact only served to keep me prisoner. I was locked up so tightly that I didn’t realize what harm I was doing.

So don’t let me build walls My Master, make them tumble every time.